Sunday, May 16, 2010

Tiny Tim Tiptoes Through the Tulips

Today, in Sunday's Buffalo News, Your King happened to read a letter to the paper that was so moronic I just have to say something about it. The letter was about Buffalo Sabres center 'Tiny' Tim Connolly. Obviously the letter writer from Hamburg, and for the sake of protecting the ignorant I will call Ed Wrong, must have been watching a different Tim Connolly than the one everyone one else was watching. In the first paragraph of his letter Mr. Wrong berated Jerry Sullivan, a writer for the Buffalo News, who wants to see Tim Connolly dismissed from the team for being too soft. I happen to totally agree with Mr. Sullivan and I wish to see Tiny Tim on the first boat to China.
Mr. Wrong also stated that Mr. Sullivan said the same thing about Miroslav Satan when he was with the Sabres and we all know that when the going got tough Miro disappeared. Mr. Wrong, in trying to refute this, also states that Satan scored two game winning goals against the Sabres in this years playoffs. What Mr. Wrong does not state that since the bulk of the Sabres squad is soft to begin with Satan does not have to play with grit to be able to score. Anyone who watched the series was left shaking his head at the opportunities the softy Sabres gave Satan. He was never threatened as he neared the net. If he tried doing that against a team like the Flyers he would have ended up on the disabled list. But that would not have happened as Miro Satan would not have gone anywhere near the net. If a game was on the line Miro Satan made like Houdini and disappeared. Just like Tiny Tim Connolly.
Mr. Wrong states that Tiny Tim is a finesse player and one of the greatest stick handlers in the game. First of all finesse equals soft and the second part of that statement is just plain laughable. As I have said before Tiny Tim is one of the greatest Sabre penalty killers but the problem is that he only plays on the Sabres' power play. I remember one power play against the Capitals where he tried to stick handle into the Cap's zone three different times and was thwarted three different times. On the fourth attempt by Tiny Tim to stick handle into the Cap's zone he was stripped of the puck and that resulted in a Washington breakaway in which the player scored a shorthanded goal. Tiny Tim should have been awarded an assist on the play.
He mentions that he should be a very capable second or third line center. Hmm, for what the Sabres are paying this slug he should be a first line center. The crime is that Tiny Tim is making 4.5 million dollars a year and somehow he has not yet been arrested for Grand Larceny. ( Note: It would have only cost another 500 thousand dollars per year to keep Chris Drury) Anybody making that kind of money in the NHL should be able to play with some heart. Unfortunately Tiny Tim needs a heart transplant and not even the reformed Mr. Scrooge would pay for that.
The most moronic part of the letter states, and I quote: "Finally, how can a guy who has suffered multiple concussions and other injuries be considered "soft"?" Anyone who knows Tiny Tim's history knows the total moronica of this statement. He did not get his concussions from being tough. He got them from being stupid. Anyone who lowers his head while skating through the middle of the ice and then makes a cut is just asking to have his head removed. And that is what happened. I believe, and I may be wrong on about the name of the opposing player, Chris Neal, of the Ottawa Senators, eyes must have lit up like a Christmas Tree when Tiny Tim turned into is line of travel with his head down. The resulting hit left Tiny Tim's brains scrambled for almost a year. As I have said that is not being tough, its being stupid.
There were other letters to the editor in the paper today which pretty much agree with my feelings about the Sabre's overpaid softy. If the Sabres can unload Tiny Tim's contract on some moronic team it would free up cash to spend on a quality free agent with some grit. But knowing the Sabres they will keep Tiny Tim and the rest of the softies to break our hearts again next year. One of the few players with grit is Mike Grier and he is a free agent and will probably be allowed to walk. That figures. The teams that win are the teams that play with heart when it counts. Unfortunately Tiny Tim and the rest of the Sabres' Tin Men will always stand and watch other teams hoist the cup. Teams that play with heart. Maybe its time we hire the Wizard of Oz as the Sabres' next GM. He most certainly would be better than Darcy Regier.
All I can say to Mr. Wrong is to wake up and smell the coffee, visit the optometrist and re-watch all of the Sabre's games from this past season. In retrospect Tiny Tim may score a lot of points but they are mostly empty points and that is the difference.
Your King has spoken.

No comments: