Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Fine Print Moronica Spotted from the Royal Observatory

Well, your King went out to get today's mail from the old box. It had one thing in it and that was the regular monthly Valupak envelope of coupons for me to peruse. I got to the coupon for Palermo's Subs and Pizza shop and I just had to shake my head after reading through it's various offers. Among the offers they had a coupon for a large pizza with unlimited toppings for $9.99. As always these coupons have the dreaded fine print and the fine print for this one stated "additional toppings extra". I am trying to figure out what more I can put on the pizza besides the unlimited toppings. What additional toppings are there to include on the pizza after you have already told them to load it up with the unlimited toppings? Maybe I should call them and find out what the additional toppings are that need to be charged for when I ask for an unlimited topping pizza. Maybe it is the cheese and sauce that need to be added on to the charges. I can imagine the conversation going thusly...
"I would like to order the large pizza with unlimited toppings please for $9.99."
"Would you like everything on it?"
"You bet I would, you can't beat the price of $9.99 for a loaded pizza."
"Would you like sauce and cheese included on your pizza?"
"Most certainly!!"
"Your total will be $26.99 and you can pick it up in 30 minutes."
"$26.99???? What happened to $9.99????"
"That is the price when you include the sauce and the cheese. If you look at the coupon it says 'additional toppings extra'."
"Huh?? What??? Isn't that included already?"
"C'mon, what do you expect for $9.99?? On this pizza the sauce and the cheese are extra."
"Please cancel my order..goodbye."
Oh man. The fine print will get you every time.
It is now time for your King to watch the Sabres get their collective butts whipped. Have a pleasant evening.

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